Here we go - its 6 in the morning and I'm gathering passport, euros, tickets, moneybelt.................familiar tenseness, excitement, nervousness. Cant sleep any more. All the anxt of the last few days - eye infection, tears at saying goodbye to my lovely job and the people I work with, all the hassle of trying to get everything done and feeling physically dreadful, just the exhaustion of being knackered through and through by stuff over the last few weeks................all that somehow fading. My rucksack is ready. I'm ready, or as ready as I ever will be.
Why do I do it? Goodness only knows. But its - what? - a compulsion? Its not restful or relaxing which should be what I need just now, but its me.
Yesterday was letting go - a lunch to say goodbye to work, and the most lovely flowers - they smelled so gorgeous - pink roses! how I have changed! Or is it mellowed? Pink roses! I love them! A special bouquet designed to exactly fit in my bicycle pannier for the journey home! Then a comfortable, relaxed and warm chat with my son over the phone was absolutely the best antidote to succumbing to knackerdness possible. A sleep, last minute packing, last load of washing on, sorting out care and support for my mother should she need it while I am away (one of the most lovely thing about having children is when they grow up and take things on, without complaint or reproach) and then a lovely sing in the evening.......................... and a pretty good sleep last night.
Prague here I come!
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